Crone's Ease

Perhaps, you’ve heard of Crohn’s Disease?

Named for one of three MDs, who, in the early 1930’s at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York, observed patients with symptoms of inflammation in the gut. 

Doctor Burrill Bernard Crohn is credited with bringing attention to this collection of symptoms, which is recognized as a syndrome - just as migraine or recurring headaches, asthma and fibromyalgia are. 

Syndromes can have triggers and are sometimes associated with previous traumatic impacts which have caused the nervous system to go into Fight and/or Flight, while simultaneously going into complete Shutdown. It’s like asking the bowel to evacuate, so we can run as fast as we possibly can, (befuddling and be-fowling the would-be predator), and, at the same time, telling the nervous system to dive, dive, dive and stop all but life-saving processes:  Full speed ahead, and play dead at the same time. Confusing, to say the least. The gut responds with spasms - open, close, open, close, open, close. Thanks for naming it, Dr. Crohn!

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I would like to name a new syndrome, or collection of symptoms, which I’ve observed presenting in women who have PMZ - Post Menopausal Zest.  I call it Crone’s Ease.  An alternate acronym is: UPNUT.

You may be wondering what symptoms this syndrome comprises?

-Unbridled out-breaks of joy

-Pervasive attitude of optimism

        -Not giving a *@#^!! about what anyone else thinks of what she does

-Unpredictable bouts of blowing bubbles when children (of all ages) are present

-Tending toward self-care, making sure her own oxygen mask is in place before diving-in to help others

There are other symptoms, but they vary from woman to individual uppity woman. Some of our sisters may not experience PMZ or UPNUT. All we can do is love 'em up and keep the light on for them. Maybe they will. Maybe they won't.

Sometimes, again, not always, but often, there is a sweet time during pregnancy - usually at the end of the second trimester or beginning of the third, when a mother-to-be is past morning sickness, but not yet feeling like a beached whale. The handy pouch of the expando-belly keeps baby safe while mom goes about her business - pretty-much as-usual... no diapers to change yet, no fussy tummy to soothe, or ravenous hunger to nurse, but with that anticipatory joy that something good is a-comin'.

Similarly, there is a sweet spot as we women age, when our adult children need us less, as they busy themselves with their own life’s endeavors, and before decrepitude creeps up on us - somewhere between gratitude (that they've made it through most of the maze of life's vicissitudes) and our own (potential, but not guaranteed) infirmitude. 

That SWEET SPOT (not to be confused with the G-Spot, although it could be that yummy), is the time I dub... “CRONE’S EASE.”

Are you with me?

Crone's Ease supports the culture, when we walk away from the all-consuming mall and towards children. Whether we have actual grandchildren or not, hanging out with young ones can remind us to enjoy our second childhood by being delighted - not despondent, curious - not calamitous, innovative not enervated, and above all: engaged - not dis.

Bonuses are given us for every action which helps a child feel empowered and more in alignment with her or his essence.

A friend recently divulged a story of her involvement in helping a great nephew simply by paying attention to his symptoms and helping his mama google solutions for a tricky syndrome. Trite but true: It takes a village.

Once we've tried our hand at parenting, we can use those same skills to GRAND parent - or to become an "extend-a-helping-hand-parent."

Whether we become story-tellers in classrooms, bubble-blowers in parks, extra-caring aunties or, more formally, volunteer our time at venues where kids need mentors, our silver years can be filled to overflowing with our Ease of Being as Wise Women for our tribe.

A couple of years ago, when cleaning out my mother's closets - over-stuffed with the accumulation of her life experience,  I came across her blue volunteer apron from her stint at Children's Hospital Los Angeles. I smiled with pride right into the eyes in her photo on the name badge - thinking of the hours she spent quietly (or animatedly) reading to young ones in the play room. Thanks, Mom.

Joseph Campbell reminds us to follow our bliss. Whatever makes our eyes light up, brings us into closer alignment with our soul’s unique journey. In the case of my friend, the lightness in her heart, and in the great nephew’s heart  & the heart of his grateful mama was yummy. In the case of my mom, she always claimed she got far more than she could ever give back to the children at CHLA.

Come here for a purpose? Come here often?

We don’t have to fillet our heart to read the map. Follow the blinkers of eyes lighting up. What better time to tune-in and bliss-up than in the sweet-spot time of PMZ?

Enjoy your own version of Crone’s Ease, won’t you?